Addictive,
With a personality I still don't know.
Scared with reminders of yesterday,
Like a glass that's no longer transparent.
Quick to judge not.
But its obvious I have my own wounds to mend,
Its on the page of things to do,
Sew them shut and kill the curiosity .
Into the air.
Into the air.
Into the air....
And once again I learn how to breathe.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Fate Wont Swallow
Sorry for not getting back to you
I was busy doing nothing just so you know
Killing time as it kills me.
A captured heart unable to change
As the friction grows
I can no longer stay the same face
Wrinkled and blackened by the long nights
1000 battles to be fought everyday
Most are lost
Faded colors and memories still trying to find their place.
I have to stay awake though
All in hopes to catch fate and she sneaks out from under my sheets.
I was busy doing nothing just so you know
Killing time as it kills me.
A captured heart unable to change
As the friction grows
I can no longer stay the same face
Wrinkled and blackened by the long nights
1000 battles to be fought everyday
Most are lost
Faded colors and memories still trying to find their place.
I have to stay awake though
All in hopes to catch fate and she sneaks out from under my sheets.
Race the Rat
Time is worth her soul
beyond love there is still no control
bones of broken dreams and cold steal beams
it seams that we all have one thing in common.
bright lights at nights end.
picture perfect but all faces are plastered here.
Nailed to the wall but not the cross we must sacrifice for tomorrow.
The hands of the clock are always the heaviest here.
Time a creation of control built by the same people whom it erases.
Disappointment when those shadows disappear
The love you have seen is not what you deserve.
beyond love there is still no control
bones of broken dreams and cold steal beams
it seams that we all have one thing in common.
bright lights at nights end.
picture perfect but all faces are plastered here.
Nailed to the wall but not the cross we must sacrifice for tomorrow.
The hands of the clock are always the heaviest here.
Time a creation of control built by the same people whom it erases.
Disappointment when those shadows disappear
The love you have seen is not what you deserve.
If they Do
Blessed beyond imagination.
Stuck in the same ruts and I still reopen these old cuts.
Don't see that label "fuck up" much anymore.
But all I'm doing is getting older.
They say its best when its loved,
to hang in there when it hurts
and shit if the moneys good why not?
I don't blame you.
I blame myself and always will
Filled voids with unforgiving vices
Stuck in the same ruts and I still reopen these old cuts.
Don't see that label "fuck up" much anymore.
But all I'm doing is getting older.
They say its best when its loved,
to hang in there when it hurts
and shit if the moneys good why not?
I don't blame you.
I blame myself and always will
Filled voids with unforgiving vices
E.E
You need to work to be a man.
Just cause your hands are steady doesn't mean that your head is.
What about your heart?
No one will ever know what you keep in between those shoulders.
A sober road is never the safe one, a white knuckled drive that has to be done.
Pressure never makes perfect it just creates cracks.
Enough is enough.
Just cause your hands are steady doesn't mean that your head is.
What about your heart?
No one will ever know what you keep in between those shoulders.
A sober road is never the safe one, a white knuckled drive that has to be done.
Pressure never makes perfect it just creates cracks.
Enough is enough.
you want me to hide in that?
Catching ghosts out the corner of my eye,
cant help but think that is my own shadow passing me by.
heart full of something.
I could give it too you.
But the voices never stop talking ,
and I cant keep them out of tune for much longer.
Faced two eyes in the mirror
the bloodshot reflection just seems like a cliche now
I've kept it all hidden away.
cant help but think that is my own shadow passing me by.
heart full of something.
I could give it too you.
But the voices never stop talking ,
and I cant keep them out of tune for much longer.
Faced two eyes in the mirror
the bloodshot reflection just seems like a cliche now
I've kept it all hidden away.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
hello evening
Check the videos out.
This band is full of good people and friends of mine plus they are very talented musicians.
This band is full of good people and friends of mine plus they are very talented musicians.
Nail bitters
loosing all parts of face,
as the mirror silently escapes.
whats left to chase,
chasing away the bottle,
broken in so many ways but these walls can only be built from the ground up.
Chin up,
left foot in front,
right behind every chance that came.
Forgetting to blame myself for the rain
but it came and washed the slates free from pain.
burdened down to create a dying sound
but who will hear the last spoken word?
as the mirror silently escapes.
whats left to chase,
chasing away the bottle,
broken in so many ways but these walls can only be built from the ground up.
Chin up,
left foot in front,
right behind every chance that came.
Forgetting to blame myself for the rain
but it came and washed the slates free from pain.
burdened down to create a dying sound
but who will hear the last spoken word?
ill f/x
It didn't stop but it changed everything.
Building up together
who knew I would see years past you.
Again this was far to soon.
We won and lost
took the amount and guessed the cost.
But life brought us things that we didn't ask for.
Together to young to know to old to care
to be fare I'm sorry I went a different way.
It seemed you remained the same in the old ways
with the same people that we loved.
I have your face in so many a great place.
Your race is done
I will continue on mine until I can no longer run.
A brother. A friend. A teammate.
I love you
I will miss you.
RIP
little Mikey.
Building up together
who knew I would see years past you.
Again this was far to soon.
We won and lost
took the amount and guessed the cost.
But life brought us things that we didn't ask for.
Together to young to know to old to care
to be fare I'm sorry I went a different way.
It seemed you remained the same in the old ways
with the same people that we loved.
I have your face in so many a great place.
Your race is done
I will continue on mine until I can no longer run.
A brother. A friend. A teammate.
I love you
I will miss you.
RIP
little Mikey.
Friday, May 21, 2010
Getting lucky
One day for tomorrow,
no rush to yesterday,
and the sky is more than enough for now.
For now the limits have been seized
just like his dreams that came true
the blue still shines trough.
To many shoes quit walking here
as if 12 steps seemed to far to count let alone walk.
Bent to bend to never break
but they said they stopped making these things as strong as they used too.
I guess I got lucky.
Enough space here,
but a lot of it was left empty.
Heavy with the head but the heart feels the freedom.
Accomplished to accompany any enemy to the end,
better left unsaid the wrong words when everything is right,
here tonight these hands are beaten and clean
tired but never defeated
I will watch them until they become depleted of everything that's real
no rush to yesterday,
and the sky is more than enough for now.
For now the limits have been seized
just like his dreams that came true
the blue still shines trough.
To many shoes quit walking here
as if 12 steps seemed to far to count let alone walk.
Bent to bend to never break
but they said they stopped making these things as strong as they used too.
I guess I got lucky.
Enough space here,
but a lot of it was left empty.
Heavy with the head but the heart feels the freedom.
Accomplished to accompany any enemy to the end,
better left unsaid the wrong words when everything is right,
here tonight these hands are beaten and clean
tired but never defeated
I will watch them until they become depleted of everything that's real
Breakdown at breakfast
Fuck this
to much cost for this dead end world.
All I see is the end here.
Spent to much time just to feed a need.
Now I bleed on foreign soil,
as the days toil away
crumbled up and tossed
like forgotten foil
I make my way down the street I don't want to walk.
With cheap talk and language lesson of forgetting everything that I heard in the morning.
All for what?
Just to collapse and find myself breathing the same stench as yesterdays trash.
Bound to this beauty of this proving ground,
but was sold on the picture of it.
The real now sat clear in my eyes
and I knew I was going to be testing my heart.
Ready to leave this
got to the end of this rainbow
nothing here,
but cigarette butts and a broken clock that still ticks.
As the last token gets tossed,
I walk away already knowing what its about to say
to much cost for this dead end world.
All I see is the end here.
Spent to much time just to feed a need.
Now I bleed on foreign soil,
as the days toil away
crumbled up and tossed
like forgotten foil
I make my way down the street I don't want to walk.
With cheap talk and language lesson of forgetting everything that I heard in the morning.
All for what?
Just to collapse and find myself breathing the same stench as yesterdays trash.
Bound to this beauty of this proving ground,
but was sold on the picture of it.
The real now sat clear in my eyes
and I knew I was going to be testing my heart.
Ready to leave this
got to the end of this rainbow
nothing here,
but cigarette butts and a broken clock that still ticks.
As the last token gets tossed,
I walk away already knowing what its about to say
Maybe a vase is better.
There is this problem here
with you and I
our eyes don't meet anywhere anymore
and lately I cant recognize my own face
Knowing your face is to hard to trace
I only want picture you smiling
remember when it came naturally to you?
Now the force of your movements puts a false action under you breath.
What took your heart.
Clearly your clarity is gone
where were you the last time your eyes looked straight.
Trying to catch the last glimpse of fate out the corner or your eye
stopped working the moment you saw that butterfly die.
Hows it going to be when your heart changes again
and you wont see me.
I polished away everything that was dulling my soul.
Its hard to let you know you got cold from the clouds and the rain kept that smile away,
you have found comfort in your pain
and
when this ends my friend
I'm sure we will find out that we have the same veins
with you and I
our eyes don't meet anywhere anymore
and lately I cant recognize my own face
Knowing your face is to hard to trace
I only want picture you smiling
remember when it came naturally to you?
Now the force of your movements puts a false action under you breath.
What took your heart.
Clearly your clarity is gone
where were you the last time your eyes looked straight.
Trying to catch the last glimpse of fate out the corner or your eye
stopped working the moment you saw that butterfly die.
Hows it going to be when your heart changes again
and you wont see me.
I polished away everything that was dulling my soul.
Its hard to let you know you got cold from the clouds and the rain kept that smile away,
you have found comfort in your pain
and
when this ends my friend
I'm sure we will find out that we have the same veins
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Bora Bora
Ideas shared backwards
hidden agendas just under the breath
dry lips and twisted jaws
smoke to think,
drink to fit somewhere.
tomorrows established values
only to still sink.
Screaming mend us in every ear
choking on the flaw's
but smiling to the crowd who's afraid to know the truth
Smiling for the blade
summers for the sane
I'll sell my name to stay out of this game
backstabbing move but that's usually what I do
hurt by my own hand
I wont let yours come close enough to do damage.
flame and coal burn fast
but I cant listen that sound of silence right now
Its better to write sad songs than poems of love.
hidden agendas just under the breath
dry lips and twisted jaws
smoke to think,
drink to fit somewhere.
tomorrows established values
only to still sink.
Screaming mend us in every ear
choking on the flaw's
but smiling to the crowd who's afraid to know the truth
Smiling for the blade
summers for the sane
I'll sell my name to stay out of this game
backstabbing move but that's usually what I do
hurt by my own hand
I wont let yours come close enough to do damage.
flame and coal burn fast
but I cant listen that sound of silence right now
Its better to write sad songs than poems of love.
Fresh
something used
something bruised and beautiful
its all here
shattered glass and torn eyes.
lies,cries and unlawful punishment.
enough cement already.
lines to skin ink goes deep
sink from the surface to get a real view.
A fresh perspective.
something bruised and beautiful
its all here
shattered glass and torn eyes.
lies,cries and unlawful punishment.
enough cement already.
lines to skin ink goes deep
sink from the surface to get a real view.
A fresh perspective.
So Far Away
Shes to young to care
but old enough to know that
her dads not around.
no apologies.
cant say much when I'm choking anyways.
Practicing the lines I would say in my mind.
quite and alone,but dirty and low.
remaining obnoxiously patient
figuring I should just drop my anchor here,
shattering all the dreams I keep under the surface.
what else is there to focus on when I cry to keep from laughing on purpose.
but old enough to know that
her dads not around.
no apologies.
cant say much when I'm choking anyways.
Practicing the lines I would say in my mind.
quite and alone,but dirty and low.
remaining obnoxiously patient
figuring I should just drop my anchor here,
shattering all the dreams I keep under the surface.
what else is there to focus on when I cry to keep from laughing on purpose.
JUST GREY
Where does this stand
Sit with me somewhere
before we both know it
it will all be over
to soon sure
they've labeled me with numbers now
so all I can do is count down
still stuck by yesterdays fuck ups
and trying to make tomorrow brighter is killing the best parts of me.
Froze to sink to the levels of all the rest
cant stand this taste
nothing stronger than water to wash it all down with
they say I'm free..but from what
surely not myself
Tilt this till it all tumbles over
I have that nervous habit to keep looking left
To many distant thoughts to never find my way back
here and now
show some sings of life for this first time
and I will show you what its like to hide from the sunshine
I have failed to mention this but your eyes are crossed
I am the wood they build crosses out of
and you are the kind of person they sacrifice.
a perfect match in this brutal array
the only crime they can frame me with is never excepting what is
maybe always something more I don't know but I follow my heart
sometimes I listen to the rain and as the water builds puddles
I think of that tidal wave I hide in my chest
the storm before the calm never seemed so bleak
Ill place my feet in front of me when its my turn to walk the plank
surrounded by the blank stares
I will go to the depths that so few know
a stitched sword to a crooked pen
I would bend backwards to see any of you happy
once my back breaks than maybe you will realize that I was not selfish
Haunt the shallows of your soul
continue through until you've found that gold
are we all two toned or just grey.
Sit with me somewhere
before we both know it
it will all be over
to soon sure
they've labeled me with numbers now
so all I can do is count down
still stuck by yesterdays fuck ups
and trying to make tomorrow brighter is killing the best parts of me.
Froze to sink to the levels of all the rest
cant stand this taste
nothing stronger than water to wash it all down with
they say I'm free..but from what
surely not myself
Tilt this till it all tumbles over
I have that nervous habit to keep looking left
To many distant thoughts to never find my way back
here and now
show some sings of life for this first time
and I will show you what its like to hide from the sunshine
I have failed to mention this but your eyes are crossed
I am the wood they build crosses out of
and you are the kind of person they sacrifice.
a perfect match in this brutal array
the only crime they can frame me with is never excepting what is
maybe always something more I don't know but I follow my heart
sometimes I listen to the rain and as the water builds puddles
I think of that tidal wave I hide in my chest
the storm before the calm never seemed so bleak
Ill place my feet in front of me when its my turn to walk the plank
surrounded by the blank stares
I will go to the depths that so few know
a stitched sword to a crooked pen
I would bend backwards to see any of you happy
once my back breaks than maybe you will realize that I was not selfish
Haunt the shallows of your soul
continue through until you've found that gold
are we all two toned or just grey.
Daily
The weight of my head is heavy
filled with to much of all the wrong things
like a ghost that sleeps
I cant make sense
to weak to feel my hands or feet
and I'm to scared to drink.
filled with to much of all the wrong things
like a ghost that sleeps
I cant make sense
to weak to feel my hands or feet
and I'm to scared to drink.
a sate of mind.
There is this madness here,
burned up and smashed together
the balance if any is largely unseen.
An illusion of dreams and a reality that does not see truth.
Bending here to fit in with the times
but life is letting old wounds heal for the first time.
The larger picture comes only in small fragments
they all seem like the wrong piece
I need and edge and I'm given a middle
between want and need
I will eventually plant the right seed.
I need to see things come true that don't hurt
How is happiness a feeling?
burned up and smashed together
the balance if any is largely unseen.
An illusion of dreams and a reality that does not see truth.
Bending here to fit in with the times
but life is letting old wounds heal for the first time.
The larger picture comes only in small fragments
they all seem like the wrong piece
I need and edge and I'm given a middle
between want and need
I will eventually plant the right seed.
I need to see things come true that don't hurt
How is happiness a feeling?
Disappear
Over and over again,
until is grooved out and the fit is for my hands only.
wet with rain as a thousand types of tears fall.
what regret will keep me from sleep tonight?
we all die a little everyday
so I laugh as these puddles slowly turn dry.
Tomorrow is a day to be remade
the possibilities are there
but habits kill and nothing is good forever.
Changes will be made but only out of necessity
wishing never helps
wishing never helps
wishing never helps
wants are only desires set for mass appeal.
as my needs become foggy
I focus towards the clouds and hope for the best.
until is grooved out and the fit is for my hands only.
wet with rain as a thousand types of tears fall.
what regret will keep me from sleep tonight?
we all die a little everyday
so I laugh as these puddles slowly turn dry.
Tomorrow is a day to be remade
the possibilities are there
but habits kill and nothing is good forever.
Changes will be made but only out of necessity
wishing never helps
wishing never helps
wishing never helps
wants are only desires set for mass appeal.
as my needs become foggy
I focus towards the clouds and hope for the best.
OverThere
set solid
to from something different.
thoughts to keep flowing as
yesterdays life is only a hangover now.
I've watched fires be put out
mostly on a self determined path
all these missed shots
the dreams that don't work
a life that becomes stagnate is a disease
all these places and never once dropped anchor
a place to call home and a place to live
a big difference
good friends help time move easy
no rush here just always headed somewhere
and most of the time its really no where.
to from something different.
thoughts to keep flowing as
yesterdays life is only a hangover now.
I've watched fires be put out
mostly on a self determined path
all these missed shots
the dreams that don't work
a life that becomes stagnate is a disease
all these places and never once dropped anchor
a place to call home and a place to live
a big difference
good friends help time move easy
no rush here just always headed somewhere
and most of the time its really no where.
Grow
There's this madness here
burned up and smashed together
the balance if any is largely unseen
an illusion of dreams and a reality that does not see truth
bending here to fit with the times
but life is letting old wounds heal
the larger picture only comes in small fragments
and they all seem like the wrong piece
I need and edge and I'm given the middle
between what I want and what I need
I will eventually plant the right seed
burned up and smashed together
the balance if any is largely unseen
an illusion of dreams and a reality that does not see truth
bending here to fit with the times
but life is letting old wounds heal
the larger picture only comes in small fragments
and they all seem like the wrong piece
I need and edge and I'm given the middle
between what I want and what I need
I will eventually plant the right seed
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
on a wall
sick in the stomach and nothing to compare it with.
the grip of life is now loose and its your time to choose
a broken down palace
but no skill here for reconstruction
just the fucked up specialty of demolition
oh... and of course a horse with no name.
the grip of life is now loose and its your time to choose
a broken down palace
but no skill here for reconstruction
just the fucked up specialty of demolition
oh... and of course a horse with no name.
Monday, May 17, 2010
D.T.B
Erased faces
a fading place.
counting souls to add up the waste.
no individuals here,
there is no such luck.
no luxury of an identity,
to many eyes see with no sight.
and at the end of the light it only gets dark again.
cant stand to watch
it might be to late
wont be the first mistake fueled only by hate.
I tape my mouth shut to keep from wasting my words
sentences continue to go through dismal ears
as these years past the only thing that changes are my fears.
here I will lay me down
a fading place.
counting souls to add up the waste.
no individuals here,
there is no such luck.
no luxury of an identity,
to many eyes see with no sight.
and at the end of the light it only gets dark again.
cant stand to watch
it might be to late
wont be the first mistake fueled only by hate.
I tape my mouth shut to keep from wasting my words
sentences continue to go through dismal ears
as these years past the only thing that changes are my fears.
here I will lay me down
RILKE
"I beg you... to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it live your way into the answer.."
These are words from Rilke that come from his book Letters To A Young Poet. This book helped calm me down and understand that once again patience is a virtue and what I was doing in Paris was a dream come true. That dream came from alot of hard work and dedication and even though it was difficult I once again pulled through and saw things out.
living with no regrets... Right?
These are words from Rilke that come from his book Letters To A Young Poet. This book helped calm me down and understand that once again patience is a virtue and what I was doing in Paris was a dream come true. That dream came from alot of hard work and dedication and even though it was difficult I once again pulled through and saw things out.
living with no regrets... Right?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
